Porn gets political, sort of. And we have the exclusive stills.
Mike Horner portrays a governor with a penchant for call girls in Hustler's spoof of the Eliot Spitzer sex scandal in
Gov Love - The Eliot Splitz-her Story. Director Stuart Canterbury couldn't have cast a better lead than Mike Horner, whose acting prowess won him acclaim as the dad in Hustler's sitcom spoof, Not the Bradys XXX (2007). We give props to Horner's comedic timing and his excellent imitation of Eliot's goofy rubber face.
Hot off the production lines, Gov Love also features raven-haired beauty, Cassandra Cruz in the role of high-priced call girl, "Kristen." In March, Hustler offered the real Alexandre Dupre, who also went by "Kristen" with her clients, $1 million dollars to bare it all in their magazine. The offer was turned down, but that didn't stop Hustler from taking advantage of a political sex scandal in true Flynt form. According to Hustler's National Sales Manager, demand for Gov Love has been considerable. more >>
After watching this "educational" video it is safe to say I will never look at a vagina the same way again. Comedian/writer Amy Sedaris voices 'Paulie the Penis' in this parody of the sex-ed PSA.
Best line:
You might have an erotic dream... about some special lady... where you touch her in a special place... that smells like the sea.
Rob Rotten, the performer/director with "Poison" conspicuously tattooed along the top of his penis, has earned strong reviews for his latest feature, Texas Vibrator Massacre. This is not your father's porn to say the least, but the film is a parody of the original 1984 cult-classic, Texas Chainsaw Massacre. There's still plenty of gore - with a lot of hardcore sex - oh, and did I mention the 2.75 horse-power, gasoline-fueled Honda concrete vibrator? This device whose original purpose was to get air bubbles out of freshly poured concrete has been modified to be safe enough (I suppose) to rock the pussy, which is precisely what it does.
The cast is headlined by Roxy DeVille playing the sole survivor, but also includes heavy hitters Herschel Savage and Dirty Harry, as well as notable lovelies Jamie Elle, Daisy Tanks and Ruby Knox. Porn starlet Roxy DeVille tells Mike Albo (AVN) of her role in the film:
We're shooting the beginning sequence that's based really closely on the original van scene from Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I'll also be duct-taped, tied and covered in blood. I'll have prosthetic organs thrown at me while the crazy family eats dinner at their table. I'm blowing Grandpa! He's being played by Dirty Harry, and Rob told him he's getting paid to NOT get his dick hard. In the original movie, Grandpa couldn't swing his hammer to kill the girl. In our movie, he can't get his dick hard. I'm so excited, I can't even tell you.
Bubbly Florida blonde, Brooke Marks, proves that not only is she sexy, but she can tease us with more than just her boobs and ass. With a wicked sense of humor, she invents ten new styles of striptease that may or may not catch on. Most likely not.
For scariest webcam dance, it's a toss up between "Xenu slumbers eternal" (#9) and Ricky Henderson (#8). Honorable mention goes to insecurity (#3) and paranoia (#5).
Anal bleaching, it may not be for everyone, but we should all know how it's done!
The best line in my opinion is when Randolph Mantooth tells the unsuspecting transcriber from Jersey how to apply the creme:
Using your index finger and your forefinger you simply scoop a goodly amount of the soothing Lumi-Taint creme out of the jar and apply a generous amount throughout the area, gently massaging it into the skin around the anus fuschia.
"Rubber baby buggy bumpers" is just one of the ninety-nine different euphemisms for boobs featured in this parody of 80's hit song, 99 Red Balloons.
The giganto-boobs at 1:24 are a terrible Photoshop job. But the highlight has got to be the five second clip of the red balloon dance scene from Scrubs (at 2:00). Oh, and you're welcome!
Growing up I used to watch these cheesy Public Service Announcements (PSA's) about 'just saying no to drugs' and not talking to strangers ('Only you can put out a forest fire!'). Finally, someone's come up with a more realistic PSA.
I did not actually know what a Cleveland Steamer was until I looked it up on Wikipedia after watching this video:
The Cleveland steamer is a form of coprophilia [AKA scat], where a man or a woman defecates on a partner's chest. There is also an alternative method where a man or a woman defecates on a partner's chest then spreads the feces around with his or her buttocks in a sexual nature.
My question is, how do you spread around feces with your buttocks in a sexual nature?
We all know that sex and rock-n-roll make for good bedfellows. Now the two have come together in a musical marriage of manufactured marvel.
The magical iBoob is a chip that is added to a woman's breast implant that allows her luscious lovelies to serenade you with your favorite mp3's. You don't even want to know where the control is hidden... It's all in the secret diary of Steve Jobs (well, the fake one).
But if this were true, then the breasts would be a perfect sensory experience. We all love to look at them, touch and taste them. And the scent of a woman can be tantalizing. I guess for now, that fifth sense will just have to be satisfied by the moans she makes with your expert sexual prowess. more >>
Author David McCandless brings us Porn for Girls by Girls (except he's a guy and there's really no porn there).
Surprisingly, there is a man on this planet who has a clue when it comes to what most women actually want. But, disappointingly, it's not really porn. That's right, we want you to cook for us and give us cuddles and chocolates. And never ever tell us we're fat, even if we are. Unless you like playing with your hand and sleeping on the sofa.
McCandless only got half of it right, though. Most of us also want hot, body-trembling sex that ends in climax and leaves us wanting to take up smoking.
They're certainly no Eli Cross, but you can tell the folks at College Humor did their homework when it comes to the age-old porn formula. I mean seriously, what pizza guy/pool boy/UPS man/other uniformed individual doesn't get free sex from a hot and horny housewife when making a "service call"??
Seeing man pecs undulate makes this video extra special. And I learned something new: Lick the door to get your man hot!
Well, it seems like Hillary Scott is on top of the Porn World right now. Britney Rears 4 - Britney Goes Gonzo stars many of my favorite performers including Daisy Marie, Jamie Elle, Veronique Vega, Kissy Kapri, Sativa Rose, Jessica Sweet and of course, Hillary Scott in the starring role!
In Britney Rears 4, sexy lollipops that act as powerful aphrodisiacs turn their unsuspecting suckers into collective sex fiends. With nine sex scenes and over four hours of content, this DVD is loaded. Will Rider, who directed the popular parody hit, Not the Bradys XXX, tells AVN:
We took Britney to places she’s never been including multiple group sex scenes and some really dirty anal action because it looks like the other Britney is getting the hell banged out of her on an almost nightly basis. If I could, I would use Hillary in everything we do because she’s an excellent actress, a wonderful sex performer and really quite a big star.
With all this Britney Spears media coverage, we thought it was about time to get in on it. Unfortunately, the closest thing we could find was Ron Jeremy in fishnets and a blonde wig.
Ron's got a career as a Britney impersonator if porn doesn't work out.
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