Car wash vacuums are not exactly sex toys, but a 29-year-old Michigan man thought he'd give it a go anyway. Unfortunately, the Saginaw Police didn't find the man's display of "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a public car wash very appropriate. In fact, the officer who got out of his car and approached the hoover happy man on foot had this to say of the incident:
I've seen some strange things, but this is the weirdest thing I ever heard.
Heard? That's right, the sound of a dick being sucked up by an industrial vac must be pretty, um interesting.
The incident occurred at 6:45 AM on Thursday, so perhaps the man had a nasty case of morning wood with no relief in sight? If he had only heard of Vortex Vibrations, perhaps the humiliation and visit to Saginaw County Jail could have all been avoided:
I'll leave you with this final thought: Does that count as paying for sex?
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